Retarded

So a lot of people may be offended by the subtitle for this site or the title of this post for that matter. I'm going to tell you right now I do not apologize for anything, ever. If you have a problem with something I say tough. Send me an email, in my FAQ, or post a comment.

Now for the explanation. I sometimes do things that are a little immature for my age. For example, our heater has been out in our house for the last couple of days. We have been using space heaters. They help a little, but when it's in the teens outside and you have no heat it's not much better inside. I sleep in the nude. The only times I've been warm for the last 3 days has been either in the shower, in bed with my man, or squatting down on my haunches in front of the space heater in our bedroom.

Why do you ask am I squatting in front of the space heater and not in bed snuggled up or in the shower? I certainly don't know. Why are you asking me? Just because I'm the one doing it? Like I can answer a question about my own behavior.

Well, about 2 days ago, my man was in the bathroom and I was warming myself in front of the heater waiting for him to get out so I could shower. When he came back into the room and saw me the first words out of his mouth were, "Babe. Why are you such a retard?"

This is not the first time, and I'm sure not the last, that he has said these words or something similar. "Babe. Quit being a retard.", "Why are you so retarded?", or just plain ole "Motard!" That last one took me a couple of minutes to get and then I still had to ask for an explanation. Motard = more of a retard.

Okay, so, yeah sometimes I'm a little weird. But that is what makes me so wonderful, and lovable, and fun.